Thursday, May 24, 2012

to give ur life away...

To give your life away....
what a strange thought to many, to some they do it everyday and to few its the only way there is to truly live there life...

We just got home from Guatemala,for most on the trip it was there first time on a mission trip or even out of the country. for others they have been to multiple countries and multiple missions.for me its my third time down with in 8mo.

Each time is different,each hold something special in it.this last time as the trip got closer the more I had thought to try and pull out of it.not cause i didn't want to go because i did really bad.I prefer this work over an actual day to day job.but because its getting closer to go to Uganda and i didn't know if I would have the money to pay for both trips...honestly i didn't and i knew it so if they didn't buy the tickets already i would of dropped out..unfortunately they did buy em and there no backing out(not that He would of let me).

(for the first couple of days I was like OK God why am i even here?)

the knowing of why it was important to for me to be there wouldn't set in until after I got home a week later.and looking back on all that happened is like whoa.I'm glad He didn't let me have my way in this situation. 
In the end one of the most impacting things that happen was this 17yr kid heard a piece of my testimony and chooses not to go the road i went.and the heart for Jesus in this kid is amazing just threw the little bit of stories that God is doing in his life and the lives of his friends at school is the kind of stuff we are praying for to happen!
If anything the whole trip was great!even if it didn't look like it at the time. we went in not know what to expect or even what we were going to do...much like the first 2 trips.
I think i prefer it this way.it makes the trip much more exciting when you hop in and only expect God to do great things even if you have no idea what that would look like.

there were 3 teams 1 to build selves,1 to stretch razor wire around the compound and 1 to finish laying bricks of a wall,put on a roof and cement the floors..yes that was my team.we worked along side some amazing and very knowledgeable Mayans.the work went exactly as He planned it would and there were many surprises.
like when you need a hole drilled out but u don't have the right bit size and your neighborhood Lowe's or Home depot is not an option.(in fact the closest  thing to one is 3hours away).
so do what the Mayans do...use what you've got...so we only have re-bar....you know what it works really well who would of thought...
every project we did had some home made tools and idea for some.

but everything that needed to be done got done.So here we are back from the trip and for a few of us we are about to set out tomorrow afternoon for another trip,This one is much closer to home.about 3hrs away.its memorial weekend.i can only imagine all the fun activities that will be had this weekend.but nothing will be as fun as what we are about to go do.

originally we were going down to this boys home to paint and tile their house while the boys and the guardians were away take a short break.we had planned to be done when they came home on Tues.but as it turns out I get a call from the leader Ryan saying well the trip is being cancelled...but we are going to try and go down to Mexico to help another friend...I was like OK I'm down to go anywhere Ryan.please tell me what happen though.
He said a very respectable Home improvement store said they were going to donate around 13,000 dollars in tile and paint but called this morning and said they will not be doing it.
in fact they stated that they can not do it.and that what they could do wont come for another 4-8weeks and it would only be around $2000. in donations........What!!! i was shocked! (I used to work for this company to not in that area though)(don't make a promise you cant keep)

what more disturbing is everybody at the boys home had been prepping the house for us to come.yes they ripped up all the carpet and did all the demo work so all we would have to do is come in paint and lay tile.
So Ryan called back a couple hours later to say well were not going to Mexico anymore there no way we can make $200. per person work over a 4day period so we are going to try and raise either the money for the paint ($1000.)or if anything go to every Home depot in the DFW area and ask for a donation...yea now that's what I'm taking about.straight up the enemy tried to derail our plans but we are gonna keep on keeping on and do what we can to get it done.ultimately my full trust is in God to provide what is needed to get this done....4hours later Ryan drops a post saying that the Home Depot in Southlake has donated 6 of the 35 gallons we need.I believe everything is going to work out and will still be heading out tomorrow afternoon..if not the i guess my friend who sponsored the $200. for me to go will get there money back..

now back to giving your life away.

my dear aunt for years has been saying work work work,save save save! and when you retire you can go on all the mission trip you want to...
OK that's good advice but its not for me...He called me to do construction for Him and not myself anymore.that much is clear to me.
I can't come to think that when I'm 65yrs old and ready to retire that i would be able to lift what i can lift or do what i can do now.
Yes i believe in waiting on God's timing and believe me I am.
but seriously we do not know how much time we have here. this place is only temporary.so with that in mind i can no long waste anymore time(I've waste enough of His time already)
The time is now! I am alive right now so I must do what needs to be done in this moment...everyone is trying to save and build up for the future.I just want to live in the present and take it one step at a time.(now I'm not saying sell all your crap and move to a foreign country)because there are people in your area right now who need help.but for me and my house we will serve the LORD.in every place He takes us to when He takes us there.

I am 32 yrs old,no kids and no wife,no debt and nothing to hold me back from choosing this life to live.upon returning home from Guatemala I found myself jobless to..no big surprise there.i mean most people would be running a muck trying to figure out how the are going to live..me i don't care.I know He will provide for me He's been doing a great job so far.so why stop to worry about it now.
 to give your life away... doesn't seem like a horrible thing in fact it seem quite normal to me.all i can say is what is next LORD?

and for those of you reading this saying so u have no job and u cant support your own mission funding but you expect other people to pay your way for you?

No....No i don't expect anyone to pay anything for me.
I don't believe anyone should help me or expect it.i definitely don't deserve it and would much rather pay myself.
there's a certain pride when it come to saying "hey I need help for this trip" or this trip and that trip.
for this trip to the boys home and even Uganda Ive had to humble myself and kill that pride to say "hey I've got this chance to go over here and work for these people to help them but i don't have any money to go..can you help me?"

i guess all i can really do is keep asking until someone says yea sure I'll help.because i can not do this by myself or even by my own strength....

I never thought I'd be so eager to work for love.
a few years back i used to work Stone walls with my best friend Nuku and his dad Lapa.
Nuku and I would leave our homes and drive for hours just to help his dad when he needed help and we didn't have our own stone jobs to do. after working all week we go to get paid and Lapa would tell us..ah next week,i don't have any money right now.the next week would come and he would pay.this went on for a while so we would come and a lot of time not come.then at one point Lapa had offered to redo the walls around the church and other projects for the church.he would call us and we would come.we would stay at his house during the week and he would buy beer for me a lot.he knew he couldn't afford to pay us but he did what he could...In that season of my life while I was still on the run from the LORD and drinking heavily Lapa began to teach Nuku and I how to work for love...in my opinion back then it was great that he found Jesus and wanted to work for free but as for me and nuku we want money!

one day Lapa came up and said as i was working on a 40."you know Sam sometime you just gotta work for love"
 a few hours later he got some money and pay his son and I.


Those words never left me...they stuck for 7 yrs now they still close to my heart even though I rejected that thought back then.


you know what happen? Lapa planted seeds,seeds that he didn't see grow up and flourish.but non the less he still planted seeds. months down the road Nuku would get called back and I would go with him sometimes just to go and work a wall.I loved Stone walls it was my passion.they are giant puzzles,heavy ones to.but they allow us to be creative.
I came to a realization that there was 2 people groups i would not charge money to build there walls.1st was a church and 2nd was family...Nuku and I did a job for my family.I told Nuku he didn't have to because they couldn't pay him...but just as your best friends are you can tell them no all day long and early in the morning when your just getting the day started they come rolling up with hammer swinging till the sun goes down...the Family job was the last we ever did together. because God had moved me to another place.here in Texas.One thing still stands though...

Sometimes you just gotta work for Love!


the mission field does not pay...in fact you pay to go. my former co workers at my last job think this is insane and that I'm not to smart..
I don't care.working for love makes me the most happiest!
I'm so tired of living a life that focuses on me and getting me things that really mean nothing...its just stuff.


an old boss said."you would rather have a lot of money and be happy,then be poor with no money and be happy"


really? that's so backwards to me i cant even begin to tell ya...

Nah I'd rather give my life away and be happy! either overseas,right down the road or in our own neighborhoods,help the Orphans or feeding and making the poor feel like they are somebody again...bring life and speaking word of encouragement to lift up people is the way I choose to live the rest of my life.even if that means one day i'll be on the streets houseless to...been there twice a third time can't hurt...
Luke 12:22-34 Jesus say's Do not worry about your life,what you will eat or what u will drink nor what you will wear. is there not more to life then food and clothing?
what by worrying can add a cubit to your life.He goes on to say at the end. "for where your treasure is,there your heart will be also"(read it for your self)

Luke 9:57 Now it happened as they journeyed on the road, that someone said to Him, "Lord, I will follow You wherever You go." 58 And Jesus said to him, "Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay His head." 59 Then He said to another, "Follow Me." But he said, "Lord, let me first go and bury my father." 60 Jesus said to him, "Let the dead bury their own dead, but you go and preach the kingdom of God." 61 And another also said, "Lord, I will follow You, but let me first go and bid them farewell who are at my house." 62 But Jesus said to him, "No one, having put his hand to the plow, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God."


yea there's a cost to....(ive been counting the cost and He's been showing more of what it will cost during each new trip...and it may be tough but I know it will be worth it)

 weekend of work.then in 3weeks Uganda,come home for a few day then off to summer camp followed by back to Guatemala in july and probably again in Aug.and Oct. but will see. many trips no funds this may look impossible but with God all things are possible!